First of all, Kassie and I are sleepy things because we got back from the His House Fall Retreat today. Despite our 3+ hour nap this evening, we are both still sleepy.
Do you ignore the Holy Spirit? Do you ever feel/act like prayer is powerless? Do you have a boring and/or unfulfilling life?
Those are all things God has been dealing with me about lately. Bryan, Ashley, Kassie and I have been doing a weekly Bible study/hangout/dinner thingy for a few weeks. Each week we pick scripture to focus on and part of that to memorize. Last week the scripture was Romans 8 and the memory verses were 26-27.
"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And the one who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will."
That was written from memory and I didn't check it so there might be a couple mistakes but the overall idea is there.
Also, last week I took a bunch of books from my parents, and I read The Cross and the Switchblade by David Wilkerson, founder of Teen Challenge. It had some good stuff about prayer and the Holy Spirit, including times when David asked for specific signs to discern His will and stories of heroin addicts asking for the Holy Spirit and being filled, speaking in tongues, and becoming free of addiction.
Other things have happened too that have made me think things like, "maybe the Holy Spirit is an awesome part of the trinity who I need to know in order to really know God," and "maybe God can do stuff without me, much bigger stuff than what I can do."
I know those thoughts are a little bit shocking, profound, and revelatory. the most significant part for me is that they weren't just thoughts, they were realizations; not mental acknowledgments but actual realizations that can make a difference in my life.
As we were driving home from the retreat today and I was getting some of my thoughts out to Kassie, some things became clear and other thoughts became more complete. Based on those recent realizations, it became clear that seemingly mundane actions can be eternally significant. Take for example going to class. We might think that is boring and unfulfilling and seemingly insignificant, but God can do some great things with it if we are tuned to Him and living purposefully. To us it might not be a big thing to smile to somebody on our way to class, but I have heard stories of just a smile preventing a suicide. Maybe talking to somebody before class could lead to inviting them to church or talking about God or becoming friends or who knows what. Maybe the way you pay attention to the professor rather than slouching and drawing could show them that you care and make them feel better about themselves or something. The point is, God can take little things and make them into big things, especially if we are tuned into the Holy Spirit and have that daily, even moment-to-moment connection with God.
We aren't expected to change the world. We aren't even expected to change one life. God just wants us to be seeking him and listening and obedient. God is the one who changes lives, and I know he can definitely do that better than I can.
A couple more things:
Don't be discouraged by thinking about the times when you might have done the opposite of what God wanted and could have ruined somebody's life. Again, God's in control and he wants what's best for us. I don't think he would let our little mistakes ruin a person's life. Second of all, I messed up this weekend. It was our "quiet time" at the retreat on Saturday morning and I was reading and praying and there was a lady not too far away who was crying, seemingly broken by what God was teaching her and doing in her life. I felt like I should go pray for/with her. I didn't. Instead, I sat there for about 10 minutes trying to focus on what I was reading while really thinking about reasons not to go over and pray with the lady or ways to go about it. She eventually left, and I prayed for her by myself feeling guilty for not going up to her. I prayed that God wouldn't let my mistake keep her from finding him or getting baptized or something. That night, sure enough, the very same lady was one of those who gave their lives to Christ and got baptized.
That definitely showed to me a few things. First of all that my mistakes won't necessarily ruin a person's life. Secondly, God can do work without me being present, without anybody being present. Along with that, God has definitely set in me a desire for unreached people groups to be reached. While I am obviously not among those groups right now, I can pray for them. It's hard for me to pray sometimes without seeing results, or even if I do see results, not actually seeing the one I am talking to is difficult for me. However, God has been giving me some good reminders that he doesn't need me to be present in order for him to do work. He doesn't even need to pray anything eloquent; The Holy Spirit can interpret my silly humanness. He doesn't even need me to pray; He can do anything. But he does want me to pray; he wants me to seek him and develop my relationship with him and know that my prayers are powerful and effective.
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