I think I am going to write about one of my recent dreams. I enjoy dreams and sometimes write them down when I remember them.
Sometimes they are meaningful. Maybe they are always meaningful but I just don't figure out the meaning. Feel free to offer interpretations of the following:
I was in a store, like Goodwill or something, except I dont remember clothes there, just the other random stuff. I was shopping with Kelsey and we were getting some things. Except, in this dream I think Kelsey was a mix of Kassie and Kelsey or something, like two people in one. On one hand, we bought some stuff together for our apt. On the other hand, she was buying some stuff for her Kelsey self separately. Then she was gone from the dream and Mom came in. I think I was expecting Kelsey to come back at some point but she never did. I showed mom some of the stuff we were getting and I think I had picked something out for Kelsey after she had left, just because it was orange, or something like that.
Mom wanted to learn how to bowl and I was going to show her. There were some bowling balls in the store but none of them fit my fingers so I made a poor attempt of showing her with a ball in each hand how to swing it, while Amy pointed out (I don't know if she was physically there or just a voice in my head) that I am not that great of a bowler anyway and probably shouldn't be giving lessons.
Giving up on the bowling thing, we were going to check out. So we saw that people were at the checkout desk but then noticed another checkout desk way in the front, too far away to actually be in the store. In fact, it wasn't really inside at all, with only a wall directly behind the person at the desk. The wall being about as long as the desk allowed sight of some kind of town square or big shipping yard or pier or boardwalk or something behind it. The Asian lady behind the desk said she had to go see her family before she could ring us up. To our chagrin and despite our protests, she left to do so as we waited. Fortunately she was quick in seeing her family and returned shortly to ring us up. My total came to $9.46 or something like that, which was much less than I expected, although I couldnt recall anything I was buying to figure out how much it should cost. I was pulling out a 10 and somewhere in the transaction I woke up or switched to a different dream or something.
Let me know what you think.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Transliteration...I am not really sure what enabling it does other than make my titles turn into question marks, but I am pretty sure that's what the
...problem was. I just wanted to see how long a title could be. I was looking through my titles and noticed that they tend to be once word, so I wanted to go with something longer this time.
When I was changing the colors of my blog, I was looking at the settings and stuff and decided to enable transliteration, mostly because I didn't know what it was and didn't really think it would affect anything unless somebody tried to translate the page or something.
It did affect something other than that, though. It made my title into question marks.
Today was a lazy day, and I am trying to figure out if that is good or bad.
Kassie and I did not really do much today. I got up to go for a research study I am taking part in. I had to sit in a 90 degree chamber for a while and then do some exercise in it and get pictures taken and stuff. I go two more times to do the same thing at different temps. I get paid for it, so that's nice.
Anyway, after that, I went to the library to take back a couple movies (we can check out movies from the CMU library for free; they don't have a large selection but they have some interesting movies, including quite a few foreign films.) and check out a couple more. Then I came home and woke Kassie up...she doesn't work on Mondays, and I rarely work on mondays (rarely work in general, although I have gotten more hours this month than previously and one employee is about to leave because she got a different job so I might get more hours).
After that we were just lazy around the apartment all day, spent some time with God, made some food, watched one of the movies I got, took a nap, watched the other movie, got a slurpee, etc.
On the one hand, I felt lazy and bad for not really doing anything productive.
On the other hand, I think my mind is often in a productivity mode that is not necessarily good, and I think it was good for us to spend some time together without worrying about the things that need to get done and stuff.
I guess I am still trying to figure out God's will in some ways. It has been nice just getting back to spending quality time with him and getting to know him again, but I often feel like I should be "doing" more.
Well, I should probably sleep soon since I have to wake up tomorrow for the research thingy.
When I was changing the colors of my blog, I was looking at the settings and stuff and decided to enable transliteration, mostly because I didn't know what it was and didn't really think it would affect anything unless somebody tried to translate the page or something.
It did affect something other than that, though. It made my title into question marks.
Today was a lazy day, and I am trying to figure out if that is good or bad.
Kassie and I did not really do much today. I got up to go for a research study I am taking part in. I had to sit in a 90 degree chamber for a while and then do some exercise in it and get pictures taken and stuff. I go two more times to do the same thing at different temps. I get paid for it, so that's nice.
Anyway, after that, I went to the library to take back a couple movies (we can check out movies from the CMU library for free; they don't have a large selection but they have some interesting movies, including quite a few foreign films.) and check out a couple more. Then I came home and woke Kassie up...she doesn't work on Mondays, and I rarely work on mondays (rarely work in general, although I have gotten more hours this month than previously and one employee is about to leave because she got a different job so I might get more hours).
After that we were just lazy around the apartment all day, spent some time with God, made some food, watched one of the movies I got, took a nap, watched the other movie, got a slurpee, etc.
On the one hand, I felt lazy and bad for not really doing anything productive.
On the other hand, I think my mind is often in a productivity mode that is not necessarily good, and I think it was good for us to spend some time together without worrying about the things that need to get done and stuff.
I guess I am still trying to figure out God's will in some ways. It has been nice just getting back to spending quality time with him and getting to know him again, but I often feel like I should be "doing" more.
Well, I should probably sleep soon since I have to wake up tomorrow for the research thingy.
कुएस्शन marks
for some reason, my title keeps turning into question marks. once I complete a word in the title and put a space the word becomes question marks...
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Change
You may notice some obvious differences in the colors of my blog.
However, the title refers not only to those changes but also to what I read today.
As I believe I mentioned in the previous post, I am reading Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I have found that the letters offer great insight into the human mind as well as the spiritual battle for our souls.
Screwtape, a demon writing to his nephew, writes that the "Enemy" (many things in the book are somewhat "backwards" in the book because it is from the perspective of evil - from this perspective, the Enemy is God) has created in the human mind a desire for monotony which co-exists with another God-given desire for change, which must be held in some sort of balance.
Often, we exaggerate the need for one or the other in order to serve our purposes.
The book gives an example of how evil uses the desire for change to distract humans from what is important, by creating fads and vogue which call for us to utilize our resources on fitting in, which is also related to materialism.
Anyway, along with these ideas, one thing that stuck out to me is that it said, "For the descriptive adjective 'unchanged' we have substituted the emotional adjective 'stagnant'(Lewis)." Again, this is from the perspective of a demon, saying that evil forces have affected society in this way.
I think I am so often caught up in a need for change that I don't realize the value of the present, which leaves me unable to do anything useful, namely praise God, serve others, etc. This coincides with a broader understanding that if we are focused on ourselves and what we need to do or on the future and what we want to happen or even what God might have in store, we are not focused on what God desires for the present.
In conclusion, I really appreciate this book and recommend it highly.
However, the title refers not only to those changes but also to what I read today.
As I believe I mentioned in the previous post, I am reading Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I have found that the letters offer great insight into the human mind as well as the spiritual battle for our souls.
Screwtape, a demon writing to his nephew, writes that the "Enemy" (many things in the book are somewhat "backwards" in the book because it is from the perspective of evil - from this perspective, the Enemy is God) has created in the human mind a desire for monotony which co-exists with another God-given desire for change, which must be held in some sort of balance.
Often, we exaggerate the need for one or the other in order to serve our purposes.
The book gives an example of how evil uses the desire for change to distract humans from what is important, by creating fads and vogue which call for us to utilize our resources on fitting in, which is also related to materialism.
Anyway, along with these ideas, one thing that stuck out to me is that it said, "For the descriptive adjective 'unchanged' we have substituted the emotional adjective 'stagnant'(Lewis)." Again, this is from the perspective of a demon, saying that evil forces have affected society in this way.
I think I am so often caught up in a need for change that I don't realize the value of the present, which leaves me unable to do anything useful, namely praise God, serve others, etc. This coincides with a broader understanding that if we are focused on ourselves and what we need to do or on the future and what we want to happen or even what God might have in store, we are not focused on what God desires for the present.
In conclusion, I really appreciate this book and recommend it highly.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Which Book?
Well, today, I was tempted to play online games again, as has become a habit in the past few days. maybe not a habit, but a daily activity. today, however, I decided instead to write in my blog and do some other things.
List:
1: I have become a gardener?
yesterday I stumbled upon a farmer's market as I was riding my bike through downtown (related to #2, if I choose to number it that) and into Island Park. Kassie and I have talked about having plants in our apt and we have quite a bit of space on the large window sills which are about 10" deep or so, and we have pretty wide windows, too. so I got a Parsley plant because I was looking for something that could be useful and the lady said Parsley would be good for growing indoors. So I planted that and also got some green onions and carrots and stuff.
I was thinking maybe i could replant the green onions too, or at least part of them, and sure enough, I looked on the internet and found that you can use the end with about an inch of the white stuff and the roots to regrow the scallions if you just put it in a dish with water and sunlight. I tried it, and voila, today they started growing enough to notice, but not really enough to cut off and use in a meal today.
(that ended up longer than I had originally planned)
2: Youth Ministry:
In the process of looking for jobs, my parents informed me they met a guy who happens to be an elder at a church here in Mount Pleasant that may be looking for a youth director and/or worship leader. I happen to be interested in both and thus submitted my interest to the man using the contact info from my parents. He sent my info on to another guy, the current youth director who is leaving, who informed me that they are not really sure what they are going to do about the open positions yet but that I should talk to the pastor (actually an associate pastor who will be staying...the head pastor left this past winter) in a couple weeks.
I was also told by another company with a possible position that they wont be making decisions for a couple weeks.
During this waiting period, God has opened me up to realize that I do have a passion for youth ministry, specifically working with high schoolers. He has also been leading me towards doing some things while looking/praying/waiting for a job.
One thing, a couple days ago as I was biking home from the men's house, I felt God leading me to downtown to possibly talk to people who were around. I basically told him I didn't plan on going up to anybody to talk to them and he basically told me that he would send them to me.
So, I went to where there is kind of a park with a flag pole and benches and stuff on the corner of Main and Broadway (downtown). After noticing a group of teenagers hanging out by a tree, I sat by an opposite tree and read the newspaper. Not too long into my reading, a couple girls came over an started talking to me. Soon, one of them said she had to go (conveniently) leaving me with the other one (I am pretty sure it was a setup). So, I talked to her for a while and she told me about her life, depression, not getting along with her stepfather, her grandma and her best friend dying, etc. I really wanted to do something but didn't know what I could or should to, especially under the circumstances of how we met and stuff. Anyway, that was a big part of what made me realize that I want to work with high schoolers, get to know them, show them the purpose they have in God, give them something productive to do, etc.
(that was also quite a bit longer than I meant it to be)
3. Title:
The reason I titled this which book is because in the past two weeks I have read two Ted Dekker books, mostly at work. I have realize that it takes a little more than a half day and a full day of work to read one of his books because that is how much I have worked each of the past two weeks and I have almost finished a book each time, causing me to take it home to read the rest.
This week, again, I work a day and a half (1/2 day today and full day tomorrow, so I will probably read another Ted Dekker book)
I did not really mean to ask y'all what book I should read, but if you have any suggestions (especially a Christian book that might be at the store I work at, and doesn't necessarily have to be Ted Dekker) let me know.
I have also been reading Screwtape Letters by Clive Lewis and have gotten alot out of it but I have already written to much. Maybe I will just make a new post and write about it when I am at work or something.
List:
1: I have become a gardener?
yesterday I stumbled upon a farmer's market as I was riding my bike through downtown (related to #2, if I choose to number it that) and into Island Park. Kassie and I have talked about having plants in our apt and we have quite a bit of space on the large window sills which are about 10" deep or so, and we have pretty wide windows, too. so I got a Parsley plant because I was looking for something that could be useful and the lady said Parsley would be good for growing indoors. So I planted that and also got some green onions and carrots and stuff.
I was thinking maybe i could replant the green onions too, or at least part of them, and sure enough, I looked on the internet and found that you can use the end with about an inch of the white stuff and the roots to regrow the scallions if you just put it in a dish with water and sunlight. I tried it, and voila, today they started growing enough to notice, but not really enough to cut off and use in a meal today.
(that ended up longer than I had originally planned)
2: Youth Ministry:
In the process of looking for jobs, my parents informed me they met a guy who happens to be an elder at a church here in Mount Pleasant that may be looking for a youth director and/or worship leader. I happen to be interested in both and thus submitted my interest to the man using the contact info from my parents. He sent my info on to another guy, the current youth director who is leaving, who informed me that they are not really sure what they are going to do about the open positions yet but that I should talk to the pastor (actually an associate pastor who will be staying...the head pastor left this past winter) in a couple weeks.
I was also told by another company with a possible position that they wont be making decisions for a couple weeks.
During this waiting period, God has opened me up to realize that I do have a passion for youth ministry, specifically working with high schoolers. He has also been leading me towards doing some things while looking/praying/waiting for a job.
One thing, a couple days ago as I was biking home from the men's house, I felt God leading me to downtown to possibly talk to people who were around. I basically told him I didn't plan on going up to anybody to talk to them and he basically told me that he would send them to me.
So, I went to where there is kind of a park with a flag pole and benches and stuff on the corner of Main and Broadway (downtown). After noticing a group of teenagers hanging out by a tree, I sat by an opposite tree and read the newspaper. Not too long into my reading, a couple girls came over an started talking to me. Soon, one of them said she had to go (conveniently) leaving me with the other one (I am pretty sure it was a setup). So, I talked to her for a while and she told me about her life, depression, not getting along with her stepfather, her grandma and her best friend dying, etc. I really wanted to do something but didn't know what I could or should to, especially under the circumstances of how we met and stuff. Anyway, that was a big part of what made me realize that I want to work with high schoolers, get to know them, show them the purpose they have in God, give them something productive to do, etc.
(that was also quite a bit longer than I meant it to be)
3. Title:
The reason I titled this which book is because in the past two weeks I have read two Ted Dekker books, mostly at work. I have realize that it takes a little more than a half day and a full day of work to read one of his books because that is how much I have worked each of the past two weeks and I have almost finished a book each time, causing me to take it home to read the rest.
This week, again, I work a day and a half (1/2 day today and full day tomorrow, so I will probably read another Ted Dekker book)
I did not really mean to ask y'all what book I should read, but if you have any suggestions (especially a Christian book that might be at the store I work at, and doesn't necessarily have to be Ted Dekker) let me know.
I have also been reading Screwtape Letters by Clive Lewis and have gotten alot out of it but I have already written to much. Maybe I will just make a new post and write about it when I am at work or something.
Friday, July 3, 2009
writing
I decided today that I should write more
I havent been writing much lately, but I think writing is good for me
It is a good way for me to make sense of thoughts and stuff...maybe I haven't been thinking as much lately either.
My prayer journal is something I write in quite frequently but I want to write in it more and make it more sincere rather than writing I want to pray for this person and this person and this person.
Anyway, speaking of reading, I read a fiction book this week. I don't read fiction very often but I "worked" all day Tuesday and had 5 customers in the 8.5 hours I was there. I decided to read Adam by Ted Dekker. It was a good book and I realized how much fiction tends to suck me in. maybe not all fiction but Ted Dekker is a good writer, i would say. I finished the book last night after reading more at work yesterday afternoon and then checking the book out to take it home and read last night.
I wasn't sure about reading fiction, whether it would be a productive use of my time or not, but I think it was. It was an interesting experience. As I said it sucked me in. One thing I got from the book was a renewed appreciation for the spiritual realm. as the book said, it's easy for people to forget there is a spiritual realm or to not believe in it at all, but it is very real and I think it is good to be aware of.
well, I am kind of not sure what my life is doing right now, but I know God has plans for me. sometimes I get tired of doing the daily things and the other things that we have to get done and I just want to do what God wants me to do, but I am trying to remember that what God wants for me is at least just as much about my attitude as it is about what I am actually doing "do everything without complaining or arguing" "be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances" etc.
I havent been writing much lately, but I think writing is good for me
It is a good way for me to make sense of thoughts and stuff...maybe I haven't been thinking as much lately either.
My prayer journal is something I write in quite frequently but I want to write in it more and make it more sincere rather than writing I want to pray for this person and this person and this person.
Anyway, speaking of reading, I read a fiction book this week. I don't read fiction very often but I "worked" all day Tuesday and had 5 customers in the 8.5 hours I was there. I decided to read Adam by Ted Dekker. It was a good book and I realized how much fiction tends to suck me in. maybe not all fiction but Ted Dekker is a good writer, i would say. I finished the book last night after reading more at work yesterday afternoon and then checking the book out to take it home and read last night.
I wasn't sure about reading fiction, whether it would be a productive use of my time or not, but I think it was. It was an interesting experience. As I said it sucked me in. One thing I got from the book was a renewed appreciation for the spiritual realm. as the book said, it's easy for people to forget there is a spiritual realm or to not believe in it at all, but it is very real and I think it is good to be aware of.
well, I am kind of not sure what my life is doing right now, but I know God has plans for me. sometimes I get tired of doing the daily things and the other things that we have to get done and I just want to do what God wants me to do, but I am trying to remember that what God wants for me is at least just as much about my attitude as it is about what I am actually doing "do everything without complaining or arguing" "be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances" etc.
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